Grieving (Again and Always)
I wonder how many times someone can grieve a thing. Perhaps we never stop, and the grief just shape-shifts. Or perhaps eventually we find rest and acceptance after returning to the grief multiple times over.
Today’s grief was about my family, which may be one of the hardest things to unpack. I’ve been on this journey of examining the mirrors I was given, how I was taught the world works, where I was told my place was in it, and although I’ve talked a lot about the issues at large with representation, most times the poor representation starts in our own family. Hopefully-well-meaning members say hurtful or untrue things about who you are that you carry with you to adulthood. In so many cases what needs to be unraveled are our first lessons about ourselves, and with that unraveling comes grief.
Formation is about re-learning who you are and naming that for yourself. It’s also about grieving the lessons that were hurtful and untrue so that you can free yourself to feel something else*. But instead of going it alone, Formation is about us doing it together because again: whatever shame was put on you was done so in relationship, and in relationship, can also be undone.
Happy Formation Opening Day ♥
*taken from Salt by Nayyirah Waheed