Hey everybody, welcome to Femiio!
I started a blog with the intention of finding my intention along the way. At this point, at the start of 2018, I’ve been “blogging” for about 2 years. It wasn’t until a few weeks ago that I clicked into My Why, but first let me give you some background:
iiiinnnnNNNNN WEST PHILADELPHIA BORN AND RAISED… Lol I’m kidding I’m kidding. Okay but for real:
Growing up the daughter of two Nigerian immigrants in Southern California, I struggled a lot with finding my place. I was often told I wasn’t “black” enough, because I didn’t talk or dress a certain way. As you can imagine, I felt terribly confused because when I looked down at my body, I saw my black skin. I saw the melanin in the mirror (#milliondollaridea), but yet somehow, because I wasn’t fitting into what I can now confidently call racist stereotypes of Black Americans, my identity was in question. Too black for the white kids, too “white” for the black kids, and too confused to know that neither was my fault.
To add insult to injury, I almost never saw myself represented in a way I could identify with. If there happened to be a dark-skinned black girl present in a tv show, movie, or magazine ad, she was usually the best friend, the sassy sidekick, the one far left giving center stage to a white woman, or the worst of it, an extra. I went twenty-four years without understanding 1) that my blackness is enough because it is mine, and 2) that it is beautiful. TWENTY-FOUR YEARS.
I bet you’re wondering what finally happened that 25th year. Well, I’ll tell you. By some magic/luck/providence, I stumbled upon a few black girl beauty blogs on Tumblr and I am not being hyperbolic when I say it changed my life. I finally saw myself in these women! Full hipped, thick lipped, dark skinned, GORGEOUS women. Not featured as the after-thought, or the token, or the object. They were the main event, and I was shook.
The last couple of years have been me finding my way to this place, and I believe I am still finding my way. But when I finally realized My Why, it was this:
I want to use my platform as a means to show other black women that they are enough as they are, and they are absolutely fucking beautiful, as they are. Black women are not the sidekicks, we’re not the best friends, we are not tokens, and our blackness is not relegated to stereotypes or some narrow spectrum of human behavior. We are protagonists. And we can be, act, dress, show up in our lives in any way we see fit.
What I am offering to you — black woman or otherwise — through Femiio, is a relief from the voice that tells you that you are alone. The one that says the things you feel are weird, that no one is wrestling with the same life challenges that you are, that everyone else has it figured out and somehow you’re the only one who missed the mark. I will offer style advice, life musings, fun videos, and workshops, but above all I offer my presence and perspective to remind you that you are not alone.
Let’s learn and grow and change together, shall we?
If you want to check out my latest blog post, go here!
If you want to drop a line, say hi, ask a question, head here!
And if you'd like to work together on a collaboration, click here!
— Femi O.♥